A few years ago, when my boys were young, we had a few friends over and we decided to pray. After the prayers, we recited the Lord’s Prayer. As we went along, I heard that my boys were mumbling. I listened attentively and yes, quite right, they were mumbling; they didn’t know the words of the Lord’s Prayer. At first I was shocked. How could they not the words? My shock quickly turned to sadness as I realised I had not taught them the Lord’s Prayer. So how were they to know? Their mumbling was a sign of my error – my negligence or omission.
Did you know that the word “parent” is not actually in the Bible? In fact, the noun “parent” has only been known since the 15th century. Its origin comes from the Latin “parens” or “parentis” (parent or ancestor). The Bible has always referred to the family by nomination of the family members, ie. mother, father and children. Therefore, if there is no actual word for parent, then there is no “parenting”. However, the term used is “raising up”. It is important to study and understand language because it frames our attitudes, behaviour and actions. Calling a mother and father “parents” is a human attempt to direct their behaviour by talking about what they are. We are going to go deep into the original design and plan of God in raising our children.
Proverbs 22:6 (NKJV) says, “Train up a child in the way he should go and even when he is old he will not depart from it.” The word” train” means you are teaching a particular skill or type of behaviour through practice and instruction, over a period of time. Other words that drive this message home are coach, instruct, tutor, up skill, edify and prime. To train someone also means you are pointing, aiming and directing them to an expectant end.
How do we do that? Going again into the Bible, because I believe that is the true source of all guidance, let’s have a look at how the mothers and fathers in the Bible trained their children. In Exodus 2:1-11, we read that when Moses was born, his mother saw him as a “fine child”. This does not describe him in the physical sense, but that they believed Moses was connected to the promise of God. We also see, in Hebrews 11, that Moses' mother and father were commended for their faith. They hid him because they knew he had a bigger purpose. To save her son’s life, Jochebed placed Moses in a waterproof basket and released him in the flow of the river Nile, where the basket ended in the hands of the Pharaoh’s daughter, and she adopted Moses. A lesson from them, for us today, is to look at our children as unique vessels to be used by God. And we are to be expectant of the goodness in our children, that God will use them.
When they are training their child up, like a trainer, the mother and father should have some insight, knowledge or revelation of the direction in which their child is heading. In sports, a trainer or coach is aware of the potential of their athlete. Their role really is to identify areas of improvement and opportunities for the athlete. They attend to the athlete’s challenges with a view of their potential always in sight. They are always busy scheduling training, organising materials and reviewing progress. If it’s not them who provide the training, they are looking for the best people for the job.
In 1 Samuel 3:4, Samuel heard God calling him, and he thought it was Eli. This happened two more times. But on the third occasion (1 Samuel 3:11-14) Samuel went to Eli and the priest perceived that it was God who had called Samuel. So he instructed the young man to return to bed, and if the voice called him again, he was to say, “Speak, Lord; for thy servant heareth” (1 Samuel 3:9; KJV). When the voice called to Samuel later that night, he answered, “Speak; for thy servant heareth” (1 Samuel 3:10). Mighty Jehovah then revealed His will to young Samuel. In this scenario, we see Samuel in training for how to hear and respond to God when He called. If we quickly go back, Samuel ended up under Eli’s training because Hannah, his mother, handed him over to Eli for training as a priest. I am amazed and take heed to the commitment the mother had to her child’s training. This can only happen when there is an intimacy between mother or father, with God. We know Hannah had been barren and her cry to God was if He gave her a son, she would give him back to Him, and she followed through.
On the subject of the intimate relationship of mothers and fathers with God, I am reminded of Mary and Joseph. In Luke 1:26-38, an angel visited Mary to announce that she would bear a son, and they would name him Jesus. The angel said, “...the Holy Spirit will come upon you and the power of the Most High will overshadow you, therefore the child to be born will be holy and he will be called the Son of God.” Also, in a dream, an angel told Joseph to accept his wife, whom he was ready to divorce quietly, and that the baby inside of her is holy. I am astounded by how they were in tune with God and how they were given clear instruction on how to raise their baby. In Matthew 2:13–23, we are told how the angel told Joseph to take Mary and baby Jesus to Egypt, as Herod was after Him, killing all the baby boys. After Herod’s death, Joseph was instructed to return to Israel. These warnings saved the young Jesus from Herod's slaughter of all children two years and under in the area around Bethlehem.
It is so important for mothers and fathers to be aware of the purpose of their children and how they are going to be used by God. In our Bible examples, literally it was a case of their physical safety and survival. Further discussion can be had about how these parents raised and trained their children, but the emphasis here is on showing the clear awareness of the these mothers and fathers of the gift and the call on their children and how they were going to be used by God.
I do hope that every mother and father who reads this is that closely in tune with God’s intentions over their children, and that we, as parents, are willing to play our part in protecting and safeguarding them, so they can be trained for the use of God and the fulfilment of His Word. I hope that we will not allow their calling to be altered by anyone, not even ourselves.
God Bless
Mabble
Women of Reverence welcomes Mabble Munyimani as a guest contributor for our theme.
Mabble is a mum to 3 boys and wife to loving husband, Martin. When her first child was younger and was starting out in school, Mabble found that she needed more parenting solutions that would help her. She was after something not just different, but also a method that would help her bring out the best in what her children had within themselves, without feeling like there is something wrong with them or that they needed fixing.
Mabble was after a parenting style that would empower her children and leave her, the mum feeling empowered, happy and confident with her abilities as a parent. And when she couldn’t find it, she and her husband went onto create and design the environment that suited their children, rather than make their children fit into environments that devalues and suppresses their natural abilities. Mabble believes children are born with everything they need for life. She is a firm subscriber of the Bible verse, 2 Peter 1;3 By His divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life. And Romans 11:29, For the gifts and calling of God are without repentance.
Mabble believes uncovering and nurturing our children’s natural gifts is one of the parental responsibilities. We are to empower our children and collaborate with them along with the relevant people to develop these gifts. Children cannot achieve it alone.
Mabble has trained in the mental health field and has worked as a qualified mental health nurse with for over 15 years. She worked with families and children who experience life challenges in school, in the home and in various stages of development. Through her experience, she has identified that lack of expression and understanding of the child’s strengths and abilities, largely contributes to some children’s frustrations. This can be a contributory factor to some mental illnesses e.g. anxiety and depression.
Having lived in 3 continents, born in Zimbabwe Africa, studied, and lived in the UK for 12 years and now living in Australia, Mabble has acquired insights, experience and exposure to different cultures and has developed an understanding that allows her to empathise with the families she works with. She is on a mission to activate the superpowers of all family members to achieve the family dream! And she does this by supporting parents on how to bring the joy back into parenting.
Now a family strategist, Mabble specialises in strength based learning providing a holistic approach to learning. Prioritising the learning style/preference of the child and their areas of interest to maximise learning and engagement is her recipe. She teaches and empowers parents to provide environments that promote wellbeing and build confidence, resilience, self identity and life skills in children so that child does not just survive in life, but thrive.