• Women of Reverence

THE LEADER'S SPOUSE - BY NADINE JUDGE


Women of Reverence welcomes guest blogger Nadine Judge.


She is married to Francis Judge and together they lead Venture Church in Fairlands,

Johannesburg. They have 3 children, 2 of whom are married and one more who is currently in high school. Nadine and Francis also have one granddaughter who blesses them both abundantly.


When she isn't inspiring leaders and assisting Francis in leading a church, Nadine is often

found where coffee, books and internet converge.




Imagine the scene. You are having a lovely supper with good friends, and suddenly, your

very good friends, look at your husband and you and ask if they can hand the church they

are leading over to the two of you. Then, tell me how you would feel when your husband

has just said “yes” to a leadership position which is radically going to change your life, and

he did not first speak to you? Well that’s what happened to me.



Being the wife of a lead elder, elder, deacon or even a successful business man is a scary

place to be. You need to know a few things to walk in this amazing opportunity.

Firstly, know that you are called.

However, as it is written: "What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no

human mind has conceived -- the things God has prepared for those who love him--" (1

Cor 2:9)

Ladies, you need to know that YOU HAVE BEEN CALLED to be the partner to your husband.

Difficult times will happen, and if you do not understand that you own the calling to

leadership like your husband, you will be in BIG trouble.


Without going into the whole thing about women in leadership, I would like to point out a

small thing called pattern and event. Many verses talk about the pattern of both Jesus to

women and Paul to women. The pattern is one of inclusion and honour and thankfulness.

As we are in submission to our husband, we partner with him in leading the church.

Look at 1 Tim 3:11 ""In the same way, the women are to be worthy of respect, not malicious

talkers but temperate and trustworthy in everything."

Ladies, you qualify your husbands for a leadership position. You are an essential part of

your husband’s calling.

Did you hear that husbands? Your wife is an essential part of your calling – treat her like she

is that essential part.


Another interesting verse in 1 Cor 9:5 (NIV) says: "Don't we have the right to take a believing wife

along with us, as do the other apostles and the Lord's brothers and Cephas?"

Ladies, go on trips with your husbands, don’t see this as “just their thing”. As far as possible,

be next to your husband and involved with your husband’s calling – as we are the “helpers”

that were created by God.

Husbands – partner with your wives. She carries a different load to you, but she still

carries a load – don’t add to it without speaking to her.

Husbands don’t be afraid of your wife’s gift. You’ve got your own gift that you are

responsible for.


Rom (NIV) 12:6 "We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us."

Ladies trust your husband to lead you. He will stand before God one day (Heb 13:17) and

give an account of how he led you.


Please settle these things in your heart today:

You are called. You are what is needed for this position. You cannot be like anyone else, you are the best you that you can be. When you KNOW you are called, nothing anyone says to you can take that away. If you do not partner with your husband, some other woman will.


When you pursue YOUR relations with God, managing the various functions (motherhood,

ladies ministry, elders’ meetings, career, etc.) will be easier. When you try to do this on

your own, you are in trouble.

See how Jesus managed his schedule:

Luke 5:16 (NIV) "But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed."

Matt 14:23 (NIV) "After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself

to pray."

Mark 1:35 (NIV) "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and

went off to a solitary place, where he prayed."

Luke 6:12 (NIV) "One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent

the night praying to God."

Do you see a pattern? You need to be in a place of daily prayer and Bible reading.

We cannot maintain a leadership position if we do not spend time with the most amazing

leader. As a leader, you need to give, and give, and give and give and give and … - you get the idea?

Firstly, you giving to your husband, then to your children, then your congregation, and then

extended family, other friends. And often, the congregation ask the most from you. It is

about giving - time, and energy, not of things, but of yourself.

Waiting for a time to pray and read your Bible is not just going to happen. You need to be

intentional. Ask your husband to help you be accountable – or a good friend.


We should be in this for the long haul, and if you are doing this in your own strength, you

are in BIG trouble.


Difficult times will happen, finances might not look so good, you might be misquoted, you

will be judged for doing something and judged for not doing something, you could be taken

advantage of, and these are but a few. If you do not understand that you own the calling to

leadership like your husband, you will be in BIG trouble.


Be sure to be spending lots of time in the presence of the Lord. He calms you, affirms you,

grants you wisdom, is your ever-present help. Do not mini

mise how much you need Him.


Ladies may your leadership soar as you partner with each your husband, and you both

partner with Jesus.

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